November 19, 2003

It's always a very difficult position to be in when you have to make a decision between interests (thereby, confidence n security) and practicality (thereby, unfamiliarity and challenges).

It's at times like this that I really feel like I'm beginning to know myself all over again. It's like sittin in front of a mirror asking yourself who exactly you are and what exactly do you want out of life. It's no simple answer, really. Exasperating questions even. But, if you juz stick thru the whole process, and don't piss yourself off, you will have to arrive at the answer, some call it the Truth (which hopefully you can handle), sooner or later.

The truth is also a universal truth. That, going where your interest takes you will definitely put you on the path of excellence and success, if not material, at least, personal success. I don't know about you, but personal success IS Success to me, unmeasurable by any of the Cs.

It's about not having regrets, not havin unecessary distractions, not having to say 'I wish I had...'; it's about having know for sure you've gained something, grown in some ways, having know time was well spent, having to say 'I'm glad I had'.

I guess, some people give up halfway when talking to themselves in the mirror. Probably cos a part of them is shouting 'vanity! vanity!' and they can't stand it. But, hey, what kinda person does it make you if you can't even stand looking at yourself in the mirror? haha... Some give up halfway cos the process is simply too tedious. So, they let the norms of this society decide for them, let the standard protocols passed down from generations before them dictate their destiny. And they juz follow, because it seems the best and most natural thing to do.

I never had problem looking at myself, gazing, staring at the image of me in the mirror. I adore myself. C'mon, folks, in this crazy world we live in, a bit of narcissism is not going to kill you anymore than terrorism. So, I look myself in the eye and decided. That, challenges are in every job, every piece of work and commitment you take upon yourself. Go where you are most comfortable and therefore, confident, and it's impossible not to excel with self confidence coupled with interest.

And then, I begin to know myself all over again. When's the last time you talked to yourself in the mirror?

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 01:31